arkannwolf:

WO.OW!!!!!!

e-lodicolo:

moniquill:

daisiespastapizza:

chandeluresinitaly:

uwu:

you guys

this is me

gpoy

(Holy fuck this one girl I know really thinks this though.)

It took me a little while to figure out why this post bothered me so much.

But then I thought back to the crisis intervention training I get at work.

This post pathologizes attention-seeking behavior.

Attention-seeking behavior is not pathological.

Attention and validation are basic human needs. When we are denied them, we seek out means of gaining them. We will -to a fucking one- do this in more and more desperate and transparent ways the more we are denied attention and validation from others.

If someone is exhausted, and they seek out sleep, we don’t vilify them for attending to this need.

If someone is sick, and they seek out medicine, we don’t vilify them for attending to this need.

If someone is hungry and they seek out food, we don’t vilify them for attending this need.

If someone is cold, and they seek out warmth/shelter, we don’t vilify them for attending this need.

If someone is bored, and they seek out entertainment, we don’t vilify them for attenting this need.

Yet when someone is feeling socially isolated and invalidated, we vilify them for seeking out attention - often it doesn’t even matter HOW they’re going about it.

If you were starving on a small desert island, and all you had around was a box of Twinkies, there are few people in this world who would vilify you for eating said box of Twinkies. After all, nothing else was available to you. You had no means of obtaining anything other than Twinkies at this time and place. It was Twinkies or continuing to starve.

People who vilify attention-seekers are quick to point out that the attention they get via their actions isn’t ‘real’ or ‘meaningful’ or ‘healthy’ or whatever term they most prefer for declaring it invalid. This is akin to telling the above starving person that the Twinkies are not nutritious. Of fucking course the Twinkies aren’t nutritious. No one is claiming that the Twinkies will be as healthful and satisfying as a balanced four course gourmet meal. But they’re all that’s available. It’s Twinkies or starve.

It’s ‘Now people will write nice things about me!’ because otherwise no one will.

And this is not in any way pathological.

It’s attending a basic human need. As real and relevant as the need for food and shelter.

Making fun of people who are seeking attention, or socially punishing them because their means of gaining attention are transparent to you, or because you think that they don’t deserve the attention they’re getting for said efforts, or because you think that ‘they should be doing more constructive things to get better-quality attention’ is counterproductive. Unless you personally intend to sit down with them and give them life-skills lessons in how to gain TRUE DEEP MEANINGFUL POSITIVE attention… fuck off. And sometimes even then, because they might possess those skills just fine, and be getting plenty of that kind of attention, and might be tearing into that box of attention Twinkies because sometimes you just want a fucking Twinkie and that’s not pathological either.

Next time you feel the need to mock/deride/scold someone for being an attention-seeker, consider to yourself why this is your knee-jerk reaction.

OR they’re just being a camera whore - there’s really no need for that caption or anything in that vein. It IS possible to post a picture of yourself without a caption or even with ANY other caption other than something like ‘I look like poop’. I’d say it’s the same as yelling out loud how much you hate Twinkies on that island before you eat them, but it’s really not. That Twinkie analogy doesn’t even work with this situation at all barring a few extreme situations involving some extremely emotionally frail people who will no doubt become the focus of this message chain and all of a sudden make not posting a picture a life threatening situation.
Do you even realize how ridiculous that seems when you try and put them side by side
You can live without posting that picture, and if you’re really not confident with how you look, you don’t have to post it. You have options, you have retakes, and you have choices. I honestly don’t think someone with the ability to post a picture onto a social network is restricted to that and only that course of action for seeking attention.

I guess what I’m trying to say here is that captions on photos have massive potential to be really fucking stupid. They can post the picture if they want to and you can white knight the hell out of that single motion to the ends of the earth and I won’t even try and refute that point. But the whole ‘I look terrible in this picture’ thing: christ on a god damn bicycle, I don’t care where you’re from - that’s blatant fishing for compliments which under normal circumstances is a pretty vain and unnecessary thing to be doing.